walking contradiction

25 years old.
a girl of irony.
studying in university of new south wales - ba/llb.
living and let live.
truly blessed by His and his love.

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. feelings and thoughts .

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Thursday, January 24, 2008

heath ledger is dead.
i'm in shock.

and i watched trade.
i wanna kill those motherfuckers.

hearts 03:34:00
0 spoken words

Monday, January 21, 2008

the past couple of days have been spent feverishly reading my book on the sex trade in asia, particularly those that were forced into it. as i read through the book, my disgust for men grew. i mean, seriously, some of these old fugs should really go fuck themselves over. what are you, a grown man, doing - fucking a girl that just reached puberty. these peeps need to see a psychiatrist or should just be admitted to mental institutes.

what's more, the more i read, the more i despise developing countries. not because of their status but for their lack of resilience in securing the daughters a better future. who the fuck sells their daughter into prostitution, just cos they are poor? sell your fucking sons man! fuck. after selling their daughters, the only gift they're willing to receive from them are more oft than not, money. see their daughter? i think they rather die. they are mostly too disgusted by their daughter's occupation and felt that their daughter brought shame to the family but the money - that's fine! they'll take it like there's no tomorrow.

seriously peeps, i'll urge all of you to do something about it. this is utterly disgusting and makes me wanna go on a killing rampage on these individuals.  go read the book - sex slaves: the sex trade in asia by louise brown. i'm gonna watch trade on tuesday. pray that i don't start cursing those bastards on screen.

men. BAH!

hearts 03:09:00
0 spoken words

Wednesday, January 02, 2008

so 2007 has come to an end and it has been a great yet, somewhat, delusional year for me.

when 2006 ended, i just wished i could let that year slip me by as i embrace a new beginning, and, boy, was i spot-on. for some who do not know, i actually met nelson in the wee morning of the 16th of december in 2006 yet somehow, it was only after a drunk dial (from the man), a couple of days into january and a random kiss, did we end up together in the wee morning (yes. i'm a night owl) of 14th february 2007. 2007 marked the beginning of our relationship and both of us could never agree more that there was no better way to begin a new year, like the way we did. :)

in the same year, i had to face bud's 1st death anniversary. some of you might have caught on, some might not, before i came back for summer break, i was advised by doctors and counsellors to seek help for my delayed grief. though extremely reluctant, i decided that i had to do it and has been seeing someone about it. i'm grateful to all who has supported me through it and i thank you all for everything. :)

i started going back to my singapore church more often. my man makes sure that we attend church without fail every week. it might have been my time away or just my individual thoughts going awry. my mind, that resembles a highway with vehicles going at 200km/hr, will begin questioning every single thing that was being preached. there were times i had to restrain my hands from going up into the air, lecture-style, to question the pastor/elder on the things that he/she just mentioned. anyhow, i guess i'm still angry at the events that occurred in my life in 2006 and i guess, the scar hasn't completely healed.

the next thing that i guess could be seen as relatively significant was the discovery of the lump in my breast back in july. i was reluctant to get it checked. maybe i was afraid that it might be something serious and then i would have to choose my options. maybe i was lazy. in any case, my man and my mum got me to the clinic and hospital respectively to get it thoroughly checked and everything is a-okay. the lump is still somewhere within me and i've been given the option to remove it or keep it so yep, i'm still thinking about it.

finally, i guess the most important thing that happened to me in the year 2007 was the step towards commitment, especially one that's of life-long significance. those who know me well, will understand how huge this step is for me. nonetheless, an answer has been given, though i'm still demanding for a re-application from my man, and i'm looking forward to what 2008 has in store for me and everyone else around me. :)

aside from myself, some major changes have occurred in my beloved laydees' lives as well, and i just want them to know that i'll always be around and that i love them loads. :)

welcome to 2008!

hearts 06:14:00
0 spoken words