walking contradiction

25 years old.
a girl of irony.
studying in university of new south wales - ba/llb.
living and let live.
truly blessed by His and his love.

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another dimension

partners in crime
benje. carol. crystal. daniel ho. davina. doreen. evelyn. ingrid. iniQx. jac. jess. julian. karen. kimberly. leon. li en. mabel. melissa. nick. shirley. stefan. xiaowei. yee huat. yusuf. zhong ying.


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. feelings and thoughts .

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Saturday, September 27, 2003

It took a while for me to digest some stuff into my head. Someone is adding oil to the fire. Tried not to care about it but deep inside, I guess, I still very much treasure this friendship. Yet I can't believe how the twist in events led me to be the baddie. I don't wanna think about it neither do I ever wanna talk about it anymore.

Going off to church in a whilst time. It's my first young adult service. It's going to be cool. I didn't go for drama today. I was just stoning in front of my lappie the entire time. God knows what I'm doing. -shakes head- I'm starting to phase out again. This is bad. I need my concentration now.

Been having lotsa thoughts - some good, some bad. Mostly good though. I just hope that things will work out between deardear and I eventually. He received notification for his NS already. Soon, he'll become a man in uniform! -drools- He'll look so good!! I swear! :D Baby, I just want you to know that I'll stand by you through it all like how you always stood by me. I love you. =)

hearts 18:56:00
0 spoken words


Smooth and dark, you are potent and bitchy yet seductive and irresistible
Congratulations! You're a black velvet!


What Drink Are You?
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Aphrodite
Aphrodite/Eros


?? Which Of The Greek Gods Are You ??
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Cute
<<>>???What Kind Of Angel R You???<<>>( NEW!!! Anime Pics )

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hearts 18:43:00
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How random are you?

this quiz was made by alanna


hearts 18:31:00
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Hm. But I'm a Singaporean then again, who cares. :D




Jolly good, wot! Anyone for tennis? That'll be ten ponies, guv. You're the epitome of everything that is english. Yey :) Hoist that Union Jack!

How British are you?

this quiz was made by alanna



hearts 18:28:00
0 spoken words


I'm Rogue. One of my favorite characters! :D





Which X2 Character Are You?


hearts 18:26:00
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Hm. Am I that nuts? :laugh:

Season = Crazy
You're Most Like The Season ... NO wait! Hold it!
You're not like a season at all! You're a
psycho... You need a new season created just
for you.
You either answered wildly to be different, or you
truly are a 'special case'. Independant -
maybe, Intelligent - somewhat. Weird and wacky
- most certainly.
A nut case, a fruit cake, the joker, the insane
lunatic :) However be careful or you may get
locked up.

Well Done... You're not at home in any of the
seasons, you creat your own.


?? Which Season Are You ??
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hearts 18:22:00
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Went swimming with Amanda today at Jurong East Swimming Complex. It's so cool!!! Omigosh! We were like 2 kids walking around trying out the various facilities available there. Next time we go, we HAVE to make sure we have at least $13 with ourselves to fully enjoy the day!!

Spoke to her about lotsa stuff. That I'm really not please by how things turn out but I really don't wanna care anymore. My invisibility policy is going on real fine. I manage to stay anger-free the entire day! Some thing that I've not been able to do since all the bitches and bastards in class decided to come out all at once. =)

After the swim, I went off to Celine's place for cell meeting. No, Yusuf, it's not a terrorist group. Had our worship and shared our fantastic week together. Pastor Ken dropped by for a visit. His daughter's name is Clare and when he heard that I'm Clara - he started cracking jokes with it. It's just hilarious! Had real fun today. =)

By the way, I forgot to mention that I've gotten a DISTINCTION for my Gold medal in Drama!!! It's so cool! The examiner totally loved my performance as Ophelia.

I miss darling alot. Wonder what is he doing right now at this very moment. =sigh= Sometimes, things are so near yet so far. =)

hearts 03:00:00
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Friday, September 26, 2003

Not that I mind,
Not that I care
Friends I can find,
You I don't dare.

Yet deep inside
The nagging stays.
Friendship stays through
Till eternity they should.

We broke the bond,
With hurting words.
Regret - I don't.
Hurt is all I feel.

Betrayal's presence not.
But you chose to think not.
I can't change your views
Neither will I ever try - again.

hearts 00:14:00
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Spent the night with deardear yesterday. His presence really made me see things straight. Though I'm pissed by their underhand means, I fully understand that I should not stoop to their level by getting pissed at them. I've adopted an invisibility policy. They are not present in my sight till I acknowledge them to be.

Sometimes I find myself very childish whenever I think of the actions and words that I've done/say. Yet, I felt them to be justified whereas some other actions done by others were not. I'll no longer point out names cos it's totally unlike me. I stuck by a particular person despite various repercussions but she never knew them. She probably thought that why some of my friends stopped hangin' out with me was cos of my attitude but she never understood that it was because of what she has said and done.

I can safely say I've more than 5 friends pissed off by her attitude and at times, even avoid me just not to get me in a tight spot. But it's fine now. I can resume the life that I should or could have if I put a stop to this nonsense sooner. =)

Dear, I really wanna thank you. Your presence not just calms me but sets my priorities right. Each time I see you or just thinks of you, I know that I'll be able to get through anything cos I have you by my side. I miss you and am very glad that we spend a beautiful night together yesterday. ^_^

hearts 00:12:00
0 spoken words

Wednesday, September 24, 2003

Hypocrites are what surrounds me.
Who's real; Who's fake -
I can no longer tell
Even though I know them.

Tried to comprehend,
Tried to understand
But no - the reason is vile,
Acceptance is nil.

Saying one; Doing two,
Selfish I think they are.
Such is the world I live in
You should know it -
You're part of it.

hearts 01:21:00
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Sunday, September 21, 2003


Click
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hearts 22:21:00
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I'm seriously pissed off. Friends are not people who cover things up to make your life seems perfect. They are bullshitters. Friends are people who make you face up to facts even if they know you'll get upset by it but they'll still stick by you. Obviously some people find it hard to understand that.

Called Karen and complained about the whole issue to her. I can't be bothered anymore. Bitch. That's what I am. I mean, you called me a slut before... Remember? So what's new? I can't be bothered with ya anymore. If you think you're right and I'm wrong, then whatever. Go look at your own actions, verbal or non-verbal. Go look at them yourself as a third party and tell me do you think it's right?

Go think about that incident where I hugged your ex at East Coast Park during a BBQ session. Remember how enraged you were cos I was attached when I hugged him? Go think about it and how your actions were like to me at that point in time and compare it to what I've done. I tried my best to be nice but I guess it doesn't pay to be.

hearts 18:58:00
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Friday, September 19, 2003

Guys. I've just changed my layout. Any links missing or you wish to post your webbie as a link here. Please let me know ya? Sorry.

Have been getting on with life just fine. Back with him, trying to make things work. I'll keep on trying cos I believe in it. And I hope that one day, soon, he'll feel the same too.

hearts 01:07:00
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