walking contradiction

25 years old.
a girl of irony.
studying in university of new south wales - ba/llb.
living and let live.
truly blessed by His and his love.

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another dimension

partners in crime
benje. carol. crystal. daniel ho. davina. doreen. evelyn. ingrid. iniQx. jac. jess. julian. karen. kimberly. leon. li en. mabel. melissa. nick. shirley. stefan. xiaowei. yee huat. yusuf. zhong ying.


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. feelings and thoughts .

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Friday, December 28, 2007

recent meet-ups had taught me one thing or maybe two, i've changed and/or i've gone mad.

met up with my secondary school friends for christmas celebration and the topic became when are we gonna get married. it all started when they asked me about nelson and i and most of them knew that he had done the deed over the phone. they asked when are we looking at and began to do their own personal calculations as to when they should start saving up. when another former classmate of me stated that she might settle down in the same year, one of them started "informing" the others that 2011 is off limits to the rest of them as 2 weddings in that one year alone, is too much to handle - financially.

then i met up with anna and shirley before zouking with the sydney group on wednesday. the conversation we had amazed me even up till today. not so long ago, we would have been talking about the various bars, pubs and clubs; where is the best chill-out spot; where's the upcoming hip outlet, etc. yet only 1% of that day's conversation consisted of our old favorite. instead, we were talking about the cost of raising a kid, hdb prices, wedding costs and the various "plans" in life. if i didn't know us better, i would have mistaken us as a bunch of thirty-somethings but no, the oldest is only in her late twenties and the youngest was, well, me.

2 years ago, if you told me i would be having such conversations or topics for discussion, i would have asked you to go kill yourself or that you're completely and utterly insane. yet, this is exactly what's happening.

have i really grown up?

hearts 19:40:00
0 spoken words

Monday, December 24, 2007

just wanna take this christmas eve to wish all of you out there

a merry christmas and happy new year!

:)

hearts 17:55:00
0 spoken words

Friday, December 21, 2007

she's walking on a very fine line.
at any moment, a fall could mean the beginning or the end.

she's coloring her world in shades of gray.
the more she does so, the darker it seems to become.

she's falling into a deep trance.
when the time comes, the trance will turn to eternal.

hearts 04:07:00
0 spoken words

Saturday, December 08, 2007

if i should stay
i would only be in your way
so i'll go, but i know
i'll think of you every step of the way

and i will always love you
i will always love you
you, my darling you. hmm.

bittersweet memories
that is all i'm taking with me
so, goodbye
please, don't cry
we both know i'm not what you, you need
and i will always love you
i will always love you

i hope life treats you kind
and i hope you have all you've dreamed of
and i wish to you, joy and happines
but above all this, i wish you love

and i will always love you
i will always love you
i will always love you
i will always love you
i, i will always love you

i will always love you
i, i will always love you
i will always love you

-- connie talbot's i will always love you

hearts 04:35:00
0 spoken words

Monday, December 03, 2007

back to singapore for more than a week now and i've succumbed to the bloody weather. since the girls' night out on friday, i've been resting and nursing my flu. went to church, saw a couple of friends but couldn't muster the energy to say hi to them. was supposed to go visit my man's grandma but we decided against it after i was forced to see the doctor.

after church on saturday, my man brought me to pasir ris park for a walk to spend some quality time together. however, due to my flu, we had to cut it short and i remarked to him that it felt like forever since i had some one-on-one time with him. we both felt like we are married with kids and we finally got a breather from our kids. then i lamented that he hasn't asked me out on a date for so long. lol. we have been spending our times together with friends of mine or his. it was never just us 2.

my man bought me dinner cos i have been sick the whole day and he was worried that i won't eat. he gave in to my every whims and fancies. came to a point where i really thought to myself, where in the world am i gonna find another man like him? i got a little upset when he was about to leave cos we had been spending nights together and he has been taking care of me since i fell ill. he must have realised cos he suddenly said, "it feels as if we're really married".

i miss him now.
i miss him putting me to sleep.
i miss him kissing me good night and good morning.
i miss him teasing me in bed.

i miss you, my man. :)

hearts 03:47:00
0 spoken words